Living at Costco: seasonal benefits

I wrote a piece last year about Costco being a good place to hold a dinner party (Why Costco would be a good place for a dinner party). Clearly this was a joke. (Although if I do say so myself, I think I raised some good points). But I’ve also thought about how Costco would be a good place to live. Think about it: there is certainly plenty of food (both prepared and non-prepared as well as fresh from the food court), water, mattresses, chairs, toilet paper, toiletries, clothing, etc. In addition, there are many employees and a constant influx of customers to provide social stimulation. And, as an added bonus, because the store is only open from 10-8, you can have a good nights’ sleep without much outside noise. And you never have to worry about finding a parking space.

Because my brain is always churning, I also thought about seasonal  advantages with respect to qualities of the store itself, and all foods and products.

(Note: I live outside of Boston, so I am writing about the seasons here, including hot,often humid summers, tons of fall foliage,  lots of snow and cold weather, and rainy springs)

Summer

I love hot weather.  The more days in the 90s during the summer, the happier I am. I enjoy getting to wear summer clothing, not worrying about bringing sweaters, spending time outside, and enjoying very hot sun before going swimming at a pool or a beach. I actually really dislike air conditioning. I think it’s too cold and I much prefer a fan except on the absolute hottest days. That said, I know this preference is unusual. Most people just want to stay indoors in air conditioning on hot days. Therefore, being inside the cool Costco would be a bonus of living there in the summer. And, if the regular air conditioning wasn’t satisfying enough, you could always go into the freezing cold “salad room” for an extra chilly blast. (Not surprisingly, I hate that room…you won’t spot me spending time looking at vegetables!). Also, as the early sunrise in the summer can lead to waking up too early (I wake up at 5:30 many days), the dark Costco will help you get more sleep. (Of course, it’s not perfect…I will admit that it would be depressing to stay inside Costco for too long as you will not get to see much of the beautiful sun).

In addition to the comfort of being in a cool temperature, the merchandise will suit you well. They sell high quality bathing suits and sandals (I was so pleased with the Puma sandals I bought at a great price last year), beach towels, chairs,and sunglasses. And of course the summer produce is top notch! (For example, those amazing watermelons (Product Review: Watermelons…Speaking of which, watermelon season has just begun!)

Fall/Autumn

I think I’m one of the few people in New England who does not really appreciate fall. I completely agree that the fall foliage is spectacular, it is very nice to breathe the cool, crisp air, and apple picking (and making-and eating-apple crisp) is fun. But…because it comes at the end of summer, I dread it. I get sad when the sun starts setting earlier and earlier and the mornings and evenings require sweaters and long pants.

But…living in Costco during this time would good for people. Despite how gorgeous the leaves are, after passing the age at which it’s acceptable to jump in a fresh pile of leaves that an adult just raked and then not have to re-rake them oneself, raking leaves is just a chore in my opinion. Lots of raking, putting them in trash bags and then taking them to the dump. Wahoo. So…by living at Costco, you don’t have to worry about this. Instead, you can purchase a camera in  the store and take pictures of the bright leaves.

Of course Costco sells items that are particularly relevant to this season. The light sweaters and jackets, Halloween and then Thanksgiving treats, and of course the ubiquitous apple and pumpkin treats.  (That apple pie looks so good)

Winter

Ha, I really don’t belong in Boston. But family trumps weather so here I am. (I’m not *quite* as much of a weather grump as I may seem…but close.) I dislike winter so much. I used to be a fan of it, as it meant skiing, sledding, and ice skating, but as I got less tolerant of cold weather, I started wondering why I ever thought it was fun to put on a ton of clothes, very uncomfortable footwear and spend time in freezing temperatures…even great hot chocolate can’t make up for what now sounds miserable to me.

That said, there are advantages to living in Costco in the winter. The Boston area often gets pounded with snow. Shoveling is not fun…even less fun than raking leaves. So not having to shovel the driveway is a big asset. In addition, one thing that is a problem in the city is finding and keeping parking spaces. Often people spend time shoveling a space only to have it taken as soon as they leave.  Furthermore, because the snow is often heavy and wet, when it lands on the power lines, electricity frequently goes out…not fun in freezing temperatures and makes it impossible to cook.  And, because big storms usually affect large areas, it can take days for the electric companies to get around to fixing it. Having grown up on a small (i.e., not considered too important) street, we were not the top priority when it came to restoring power. But because of all the food and the nature of the store, I’m sure Costco has a generator. And, although heat is extremely expensive, leading myself and many people I know to mainly rely on moving small space heaters around to save money, it would be nice to be in the comfort of a heated store. Oh, and of course, with the trouble that snow can cause to cars, it can be nice to have the auto shop right there in case there is a tire problem or if you need more wiper fluid.

And, of course Costco is well equipped with many products for winter such as jackets, long underwear, gloves, boots, and blankets. They sell ski goggles for those who actually enjoy the sport. For those of us who would prefer to stay inside in bad weather, there are plenty of books, and large screen TVs and DVDs to watch when going outside is too miserable. And of course they have many warm foods, such as soup and coffee.  Finally, they have a good selection  of holiday treats (a common sample in the holiday season is the Lindor truffles) and gifts.

Spring

Ah spring…so lovely. The end of winter and knowing the heat will arrive soon. The flowers come out, the days get longer, and people start seeming happier after winter. The clothing is lighter, with Costco selling light sweaters, lighter socks, etc., and there is a lot of gardening equipment and flowers to buy. Costco starts selling spring produce (strawberries, etc), as well as spring holiday foods. And, grills…to get ready for those ubiquititous spring and summer cookouts. As we know, (Costco food courts around the country and the world), not all Costcos sell burgers .  And, I know my dad would say that his are far superior (“you have to toast the bun”!).

What do you think? Would you like to live in Costco?

Pros? Cons?

Maybe stay there for one season? Which?